Sunday, October 10, 2010

The view from the bucket

Hostage

Whats next when
you realize that
its those closest
to you that
break you down
that put fear
in your heart
and mind
tell you
how bad
the unknown
teach you to
prefer the devil
that you know
over the devil
that you dont
what do you do
when you realize
see the lies
in their eyes
hear the laughter
in their voice
see the stars
from the bucket
prey for me
pray on me
sometimes
those you would
have find freedom
are the very ones
that pull you under
steal your thunder
smile in your face
and reality in time
reveals their distaste
they say misery
loves company
i wish something
would take this
from me
i try to fly
and rise above
my reality
embrace higher things
forward thinking
willing to stand
alone
but honestly
that gets old
tiresome
there is no
us and them
only a world
full of disconnected
individuals
some aware of
the disconnect
and some that are not
and those that are not
are the lucky ones.
oblivious.
somedays i dont
see one thing
to smile about
but i would
rather let you
kill me than
let you take
my life
rather die tonight
than give up
what i value
the dreams
i have
the love
laugh
or cry
i
will never
stay down
i will always
answer
in time for
the next round
i will chase
specific dreams
and specific love
even if i die
broke and alone
because i
cant stop
and even if
i could
i wont stop
this is my drive
this is my purpose
and even on days
like today
when it feels
like its all
been worthless
i am strong
i will fly
i will learn
and test
and love
and one day
i will actualize
i will realize
that i
have created
myself